idungkulitayam

I can't say that I love my job. I mean, it's not entirely bad. But after a while, I felt like I stopped growing. You know what I mean? One of the responsibilities I have in this job is to build and maintain good rapport with the parents/caretakers of my students. It's manageable most of the time since I love talking with people in general. But it can be dreadful (to the point that you'll have no idea). Sometimes they can be annoying, obnoxious, entitled, homophobic, racist, you name it. Today, though. I talked with Uma (we will call her that). It's inspiring and insightful, and I was genuinely interested in our conversation. She made me realize how important it was to have plans and targets, but also, be kind to yourself in the process. I've heard it so many times, maybe more than needed. But Uma made it so simple, believable, and feasible.  Reflecting on our conversation, right now I almost have no willpower or passion to live my life. Every day is just another

Disclaimer: This is kind of my annual birthday post so I'm going to talk about myself a LOT. BUT this whole post is also dedicated to YOU, so I'll try my best to make it balanced (somehow). I've said it many times, definitely more than I could remember, that I really don't want to make anything special about my birthday (now we're talking about hypocrisy since I literally  make a whole damn essay about my birthday each year). But seriously, the idea of "special days" doesn't sit well with me. I'm still struggling to organize my thoughts about this since I don't usually think (ExFx right here), but here's what I have in mind: Gue agak kurang setuju sama hari-hari yang menjadi spesial  karena adanya konteks waktu sehingga rasanya hari itu harus  jadi spesial. Kayak ... gue kurang setuju deh kalo suatu hari jadi spesial because what had happened  on that day, instead of what  happens on that day. Ulang tahun, salah satunya. You're turning

Is it going to be a blog-worthy post? I don't think so. But will I still write it? Hell yeah. So for the starter, there are so many things that I haven't told you guys about. But to make it short: I've moved out from my house for 4 months (me thinks?) and finally experiencing the ultimate and ever-so-glorified kost-an life. I'm still writing my skripsi (bitj, bye!!!!!!!) I'm currently working at ELC Cibinong which might be the biggest plot twist of my 22 years old LIFE. But those things aren't the reasons why I finally start writing here again. So this happened last night. It was just a usual evening in Rukita, where the Wi-Fi was always bad and the common room was always occupied by those loud neighbors. And I was hungry --but now that I think about it, I was probably just bored-- and for the record, there weren't many things I could cook anyway. I was initially going to cook Indomie but my loud neighbors were watching TV. And for your additional informatio

Please don't be too hard on yourself But what would I be if I didn't?

Words vomit because it's panic time!!!  Oh, sebagai precaution, konteksnya adalah romance .  ------ Semua ini bermula dari DM-nya si Acul. Jadi kan doi mau sidang tuh, terus ada yang mau ngirim balon ke rumahnya atas nama Rosi (alias my professional and serious name). Gue berasumsi kalo temennya yang punya nama Rosi tuh cuma gue, makanya dia konfirmasi apakah benar gue yang kirim bunga, which wasn't me, of course. Gue aja nggak tau dia mau sidang saking lamanya nggak berkomunikasi. Nah tapi karena itu chat-nya jadi berlanjut. Karena nggak enak mau langsung terminasi apa gimana, gue juga nggak paham deh. Mana si manusia satu ini pake nyebut-nyebut udah lama nggak ngobrol segala. NGANA PIKIR KARENA SIAPA, HAAAAAHHHH???? #ezmozi BTW buat yang baca blog ini, atau temen deket gue, atau keduanya, pasti tau deh kalo I used to have this biggest, fattest, unhealthy one-sided crush  (EEEWWWW) sama si Acul. Nah pas gue ngobrol sama dia kemarin tuh sama sekali nggak ada perasaan yang giman

When my life isn't mine anymore. When my choice doesn't matter anymore. When my life purpose is only to please the society. Belakangan ini jadi sering terpapar dengan orang-orang yang banyak cemas sama kehidupan orang lain. Nggak mau punya anak; menyalahkan fitrah. Nggak mau menikah; disumpahin nggak bahagia. Punten ... anak dan keluarga mereka itu, kamu yang urus kelak? Menurut gue, bahaya banget sih ketika suatu hal yang relatif jadi punya tolok ukur yang ajek. Bahagia, contohnya. Kenapa sih konsep bahagia yang sederhana selalu digembar-gembor kalau nyatanya untuk memenuhi definisi bahagia itu harus pakai indikator yang ... nggak sederhana? Kenapa sih, bahagia dalam konstruksi sosial kita tuh harus menikah, punya anak, anak sukses, anaknya menikah, anaknya punya anak lagi tuh kenapa?  Padahal memutuskan buat membangun rumah tangga bersama orang lain dan membesarkan anak supaya jadi manusia yang baik kan nggak sederhana? Kalau menurutmu bahagia itu punya pasangan dan tiga anak